Bus Kya

What is love?

About a week back, there was this very interesting conversation happening on twitter about love and marriage. What is Love? Should we go the arranged marriage way or do you believe in love marriage? These were some of the questions that emerged out of the conversation.

Lets talk about love. What’s love? What’s first love? How do you know when first love happens? Does true love truly exist?

Since my college years, I have had many female friends and one question I have always asked them is  ‘What is love and are there any factors which you consider before falling in love?’ I have a fictional story to make us wonder if true love exists or not?

We have Mr D and Miss S. D meets S through common friends and hits off with her instantly. Both enjoy their college days and love blossoms. As any ‘love‘struck couple they start spending more time with each other and thinking about each other. A point comes when their friends declare that they are the perfect couple and truly in ‘Love‘. Life cannot be so perfect can it? So we have to introduce a twist here. The catch was that ‘D’ was a Hindu and ‘S’ was a Muslim.

Now you may wonder why did they fall in ‘Love‘ in the first place? They were in college remember and used to believe ‘Love‘ is blind. They slowly started realizing that religion can make a difference and started thinking about their future. Their friends advised them to continue and take things as it comes but this is the 21st Century & as ‘Love Aaj Kal’ conveyed, D took a practical decision and realized that his ‘Love‘ for his parents was more than his ‘love‘ for ‘S’. ‘D’ had to break up and they parted ways? Which love was more true and was it right?

Where did ‘D’ go wrong?

How many of you have experienced true ‘love’?



  • Anu

    First one to hop in here.. yayy!! 😛 You had to write about “Love” today, didn’t you? 😛

    As far as Love goes, it’s unpredictable. It just happens. 🙂 It’s where you trust and love the person for who he/she really is- even after knowing the person inside-out! 🙂 It’s where you accept the flaws, the imperfections and give yourself completely away to the person. It’s divine and pure. Not everyone is lucky to find love!

    And as far as the hypothetical scenario goes, I think both Mr. D and Miss S were wrong (btw, is Mr. D – Mr. Dickey and is Miss S. -Miss Sowhard? :P) in this case. Mr. D should have asked his parents first before breaking up with Miss S. And if he had known his parents would never agree to such a match, they should never have gotten into a relationship in the first place. And even if Mr. D had tried and if his parents would relent in the end, they would never have been happy with Miss S, and in turn, Miss S would never be happy in such a family where she is not loved and accepted.

    So, such matters of the heart need to be thought over well or they eventually result in fall-outs and depression follows thereafter.

    Nice post. 🙂

    • Harish aka Harry

      Anu, Thanks a lot for your views :). In the first para you say Love is Unpredictable and in the second para you say they shouldn’t have gotten into a relationship. So one way you say Mr D was right as he knew his family? Putting yourself in anyone’s shoes, what would you have done?

      • Anu

        When I said love is unpredictable, I meant it can happen anywhere.
        When I said Mr. D was wrong, I meant his decisions were incorrect. His decision of getting into the relationship (where Miss. S was at fault too) and his decision of breaking up without talking to his parents (if he had gone so far, why not take it one more step further?).

        Had I been in Miss S’s place, I’d first make sure Mr. D’s parents and my parents were okay with the match. We both would know our parents well enough to know whether the match would have their blessings. If not, I’d not go beyond friendship. I wouldn’t like to make my parents unhappy. Also, I would never be happy in a family where I am not loved (in this case, Mr. D’s family). Would talk to Mr. D, accept the truth and move on. 🙂

  • The Paeudonym

    Love is not enough. We need to go much beyond that. Interesting case study though. Have fun harish bhai.

  • Indy

    Aha! Now you are asking confusing questions like my teenage sons ask me these days! And I get tongue tied and realise I have come to the stage that they are thinking of future my daughter in laws!

    Well, I’d say to wed someone that you can be happy with all ur life is very important, but I also believe, from things I’ve seen happen, that it is always better to have the parents blessings for you to be truly happy!

  • narayan

    now mr harish i wanna put the same question to u. wat do u think mr d did the rite thing or he was wrong? u have so many relationship going around you, wat do u think did mr d went wrong in? . i ll tell u, mr d was rite when it comes to his parents view. but totally a wrong decision when it comes from a lover’s view. i am not only blaming mr d but i also blaming ms s. at least a attempt of telling the parents about the relation wud have been not so tough.

    • Harish aka Harry

      Hey Narayan,

      I am sure Mr D would have surely made an attempt to find out his parent’s views or he must be assuming. I guess Mr D gave preference to the love of his parents than to the love of Ms S.

      • narayan

        dude this Mr D should have though this before getting into relation coz we are talkin abt serious relationship here, when it comes to that it is same wat we have for our parents, arre i am not tellin go against our parents, they have done so much for us but can’t our parents even make efforts to understand our feeling???? i mean they want us to be happy in our life na, then if this thing is making us happy then why can’t they compromise with other things yaar!!!!

  • Indyeah

    If one’s parents want thier child to be happy then they would never oppose something that would give their child happiness..
    And I really believe that in love one shouldn’t have to choose…

    but parents sometimes in India being what they are…well..if one really has found one’s soulmate then go for it I say! coz its worth it:)
    and if there are any doubts then the relationship isnt what one thought it was, is it?

    • Harish aka Harry

      Hey Indyeah,

      I know I am verrrrry late in replying to this but I am glad to read your views. There are some parents who have some expectations from their children and being happily married, I suppose is one of them. I really don’t understand why religion has to come in between in so many cases but that is how the society is till now.

  • Indyeah

    You are in love with your car is it? 😀 so many photus of the car 😀

    • Harish aka Harry

      Yes Yes!! Every weekend, we go for long drives and yeaahhhh I am lurving it. When you and PM buy a car, this should be the car 😀

  • compulsivewriter

    I write about love and yet, I don’t know what love feels like. It doesn’t have a scent or a color that we can identify it… but it’s just there… it takes the right person to evoke it within u.having said that, at times, its not the most practical relationship you can get into. but then the intensity of your emotions and the longing you feel for this person, helps you decide whether or not it is worth the effort.
    sigh… love… it always puts me in overdrive!

    • Harish aka Harry

      I lurv it when you go overdrive on what love is and want to tell you that your conversation on twitter was the inspiration behind this post. We need to have a one on one discussion on this and I would love to just hear 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *